Locally-based Sexual/marital Therapist and certified Psychotherapist, Nikki Green, will give a talk on the challenges of marriage/long-term relationships, and how to ensure they don’t get stale. She will also address the problem of ‘long-distance’ relationships, a common situation in Hong Kong.

She says that having worked with countless couples she’s realized that the more traditional approaches to couples therapy; using communication and conflict resolution skills aren’t very helpful if neither partner can really handle the message!

Most of us have difficulty knowing and being truly known by our partner – especially if we rely on them to validate us (which most of us do). In this case loving someone is dangerous and the more you love someone the more dangerous it becomes.

Unfortunately, thanks to social conditioning and the mechanisms of long-term relationships the majority of couples become so emotionally fused, often without even realizing it. This is a recipe for all sorts of passive/aggressive self-preservation techniques.

As time goes by the inevitable results are; the inability to truly be oneself with ones partner, a lack of intimacy and passion in the relationship, increased incidences of hurtful behaviour including the need to emotionally disinvest from the relationship, and sadly, in a growing number of cases, divorce.

…come and find out about a healthier way to interact, one that translates directly into increased intimacy and passion and a much healthier, self-sustaining kind of relationship. One that’s more likely to survive if couples aren’t able to live together.